Me Time

I spend an incredible amount of time alone. Always have. I don’t enjoy crowds or groups, I prefer to speak to an audience than to be in one. I love ocean paddling where I’m all alone and I ride a bike, even in a peloton I ride at the back of the pack.

Being alone was always my preferred situation. Even as a kid I played alone and competed with others when I wasn’t alone. You might find this strange, I thought it was strange too, until I learnt about ego, and human nature.

You see, my true nature is what’s referred to as my constitution. Now, this is confusing in a world that measures us by “personality” because your constitution arrives with you when you are born, never changes, and leaves with you when you go… It’s quite unique to you. In fact, you can determine the colours that’ll stimulate you, calm you, you can determine the career that’s ideal for you and you can determine the relationships that’ll light your flame all at birth through constitution.

Don’t believe me?

Try this:

If you’re short and thin boned, you’ll love to multitask and be great at connecting with people. If you’re tall and lean you’ll be a real dreamer, a visionary, and if you’re mid sized and quite strong boned you’ll love marketing. If you’re short and stocky, you’ll be great in construction, management and financial control.


We are all capable of these things, the only question might be, for how long each day. If you ask me to care for a sick individual I’ll be great for few days but I will become exhausted after that… but my friend, she can do it 24/7 for a lifetime and love every minute. You see, we are not all built the same and we do have certain strengths that we can play to.

Know yourself:

In previous posts we’ve spent time talking about your values, these drive your motives and link you to the outcomes that are precious to you in life. On the other hand, the process of achieving those values and outcomes is different for each of us, based on what? Our constitution… our true nature.


So much of human development plays to the mind and this is so important, we are, ultimately, what we think. But, we can easily start to beat ourselves up for not being like others, or beat others up for not being like ourselves. Knowing constitution can resolve this quickly. Diversity is at the root of constitution, we are all the same but different.


When coaching or giving advice to couples it is really critical to depart from stereotyping relationships and offering panacea advice. Two different constitutions in relationship will function in a vastly different way than two others, really, there is no such thing as normal and best when it comes to two individuals interacting intimately, constitution is going to be a game changer.


Your constitution will reveal the sport and exercise ideal for your life. This is pretty important because even though we can all do everyhting in modern languages – sometimes our health program is actually killing us. Oprah Winfrey is a great public example of it.


In mental health training, developing mental strength and stamina for leadership, recouperation and self leadership it is so important to realise that what advice I give to you might be completely the opposite for a person of a different constitution. One shoe doesn’t fit all feet. And so, self-leadership, and all the qualities that go into making you great at your career must be specifically tailored to you, to your constitution, that part of you that will never ever change.

Like to know more?

Coaching sessions on your constitution include a workbook and information about helping others to determine their constitution.

    Subscribe to my newsletter and be inspired